Note to Bible publishers
It's sad that I have to tell you this, but the Bible was never intended to be a form letter (link via Making Light). Just look what happens:
Blessed be the God and Father of Nitpicker's Lord, Jesus Christ, who has blessed Nitpicker with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ; even as He chose Nitpicker in Him before the foundation of the world, that Nitpicker would be holy and without blemish before Him in love; having predestined Nitpicker for adoption as a son through Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the good pleasure of His desire, to the praise of the glory of His grace, by which He freely bestowed favor on Nitpicker in the Beloved. In Him Nitpicker has his redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of Nitpicker's trespasses, according to the riches of His grace, which He made to abound toward Nitpicker in all wisdom and prudence, making known to Nitpicker the mystery of His will, according to His good pleasure which He purposed in Nitpicker to an administration of the fullness of the times, to unite all things in Christ, the things in the heavens, and the things on the earth, in Him.
You see? And now that that's in print, Pat Robertson has to interpret it literally.