Wednesday, September 10, 2003

Tiny Reason #58 to like Wesley Clark

The stupidest moment of the debate came when the Dems were asked what their favorite songs were. I believed Carol Moseley Braun's answer, "You Gotta Be," but everyone else seemed to be looking for a song that, as Neal Pollack put it, was "whatever will make me appear simultaneously angry at the Administration but also steadfast and patriotic." Pathetic.

That's why this is another reason to like Wesley Clark. With this man's background, he wouldn't need to pander on tiny issues like this. He could say "I love 'Bat Out of Hell' by Meatloaf when I'm driving, but, when I'm knitting, nothing beats the soundtrack to 'West Side Story.' I get tears in my eyes every time I hear 'I Feel Pretty.'" Then he could just lean back calmly, daring someone to say something about it.

He could always say, "Call me sentimental, but 'I Feel Pretty' got me through Airborne school, Ranger school and my recovery from injuries I suffered in Vietnam." What could anyone say about that?

Now, I'm not saying that his service is a trump card for every answer, but it definitely keeps him from having to bullshit about these tiny little questions.


Don't hate me, fellow Dems, but this is funny. From my friend Chris at Pressure Drop:

Former Sen. Carol Moseley Braun -- "You Gotta Be," Des'ree. As in, "you gotta be crazy to think you're going to win the nomination, Carol."

Al Sharpton -- "Talking Loud, Saying Nothing," James Brown. He called it "James Brown's song about the Republican Party." Al Sharpton? I was thinking maybe "Hair" by the Cowsills.

Sen. John Edwards -- "Small Town," John Mellencamp. Were these people required to submit quaint, aw-shucks
pieces of Americana for the list, or are they just doing it to kiss America's ass?

Sen. John Kerry -- "No Surrender," Bruce Springsteen. After witnessing John's guitar playing on the Today
Show last week, I don't think he's in any position to be picking anything.

Former Vermont Gov. Howard Dean -- "Jaspora," Wyclef Jean. Okay. Let's get into full-on stereotype mode here.
Dean's a liberal from the crunchiest state in the union. I'm not familiar with "Jaspora," but I may hazard a guess that it's slang for the wacky tobbacky.

Sen. Joe Lieberman --"Don't Stop Thinking About Tomorrow," Fleetwood Mac; "My Way," Frank Sinatra. That's great, Joe. It's your favorite song and you don't even know the correct name (it's just called "Don't Stop"). Also,... don't pick a Sinatra song, unless you want mob connections to come up in the Republicans' smear campaigns.

Rep. Dennis Kucinich -- "Imagine," John Lennon. Well, I can't really come up with a mean-spirited jab at this choice. It is a really nice song with a really nice sentiment. But I have to admit that I would have admired the guy a lot more if he had the balls to choose a more daring Lennon song like "Mother," "Yer Blues" or maybe "Revolution 9."

Rep. Dick Gephardt -- "Born in the USA," Bruce Springsteen. Come on, Dick. What a cop-out. You can do better than that. Even John Kerry came up with a semi-obscure Bruce song. You're not even trying.

Sen. Bob Graham -- "Changes in Latitudes, Changes in Attitudes," Jimmy Buffett. "Elect me and it's free tequila for all Americans!"


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