Thursday, February 08, 2007

Red Eye at night, failure's delight

So I was having trouble sleeping and flipped over to Fox's "Red Eye" program tonight. I heard it was designed to be a response to "The Daily Show," but I think Jon Stewart can rest assured the Foxholes on this newest affront to American broadcasting standards won't be challenging him for an Emmy any time soon.

You can catch a clip here, if you must, but, rather than make you watch it, I'll just give you the basic recipe of the show so you can roll your own:
  1. Start with a host who thinks stunts involving midgets are hi-larious, that Mother Teresa wasn't shown nude often enough and, as editor, lost a magazine nearly one-sixth its readership despite plastering its pages liberally with boobs and bad puns.

  2. Add a three- or four-person sample of typical Fox News right wing blowhards.

  3. Convince them, despite all evidence to the contrary, that they're funny.

  4. Beat all of the "talent" liberally with an ugly stick.

  5. Add the production values of an underfunded public school journalism class (don't forget the cameras must move with a nauseating sway, mimicking the cutting-edge style of circa 1981 MTV interstitials).
Ta-freakin-DAH! Fox News has pulled off the nifty trick of doing something even more embarrassing than having a supposedly "pro-family" loofah lover and phone rapist host their flagship program.


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