Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Doan "totally paranoid"

Listening into the live webcast of the GSA hearings just now, the camera was down, but the audio was still up and you could here GSA Administrator Lurita Doan griping about the investigation and telling one of her people to take her glass, cause she doesn't want "them to have my fingerprints. They've got me totally paranoid!"


(If someone somewhere is recording this, please let me know.)

Update: I was right. John and company over at Crooks and Liars will have the video up tomorrow, but have done me a solid by allowing me to post a link to their video. (It's a Windows Media File.)

Have I mentioned their having a fund drive over there?

Update: To hear Doan's craziness, go to the link above, and, sliding the slider to slightly over halfway, you'll see the committee take a break to go vote on the House floor. The camera will cut to a shot of the seal, and soon after, you'll get to hear Doan told how to talk by some unnamed guy, hear her turn to some poor cameraman and say "Honestly, don't y'all have enough pictures?" and a little bit after that, she says it, plain as day: "Take my water. And my glass. I don't want them to have my fingerprints, they've got me totally paranoid."

I expect Crooks and Liars will have it up soon, but I'm lacking either the right skill or the right software.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

you've been atriosed. I hate powerpoint. Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're NOT out to get you.

10:16 AM  
Blogger dave™© said...

So which is she more scared of - the Dems turning them over to the Secret Cloning Division of the UN, or her wingnut paymasters planting them on a stack of kiddie porn magazines?

I'm betting the latter...

10:16 AM  
Blogger el ranchero said...

Great idea! That way there'll be no proof she was actually there, and they won't have any other way to get her fingerprints!

10:18 AM  
Blogger Steve Muhlberger said...

This, after seeing the video, makes me think that she is a stupid, clueless, sucker. She has no idea what's legal or not and doesn't care, or know why she should care. She did what she was told and expected her reward.

"Grateful for her fine fair discount, Doan cooperates."

10:21 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think she was told not to answer any questions or she would get herself in trouble.

I want them to ask her who prepped her for her testimony, and what they told her.

Specifically, who told you to "not remember anything".

10:34 AM  
Blogger Theophylact said...

She's a government employee. They already have her fingerprints.

10:36 AM  
Anonymous JP Stormcrow said...

I think there is a whole cadre of mid-level political appointees in this administration who truly bought the bullshit, and just never imagined that they might be subject to oversight, or even understood what that entailed. (cf. Monica Goodling) There is a layer or Rovian slimeballs who knew exactly what they were about, but then there is this whole other layer who just assumed they would always be sheltered. Gonna be fun.

And this is a window into the whole day-to-day functioning of this Administration. My favorite answer as to why the US Atty's were fired: Because it was Tuesday. Just business as usual.

10:44 AM  
Blogger Robert said...

Congressman: "And finally Mrs Doan, I'm pretty sure you'll be soon spending more time with your family"

Doan: "I don't recall having a family. Who is this Mrs. Doan you keep referring to?"


10:47 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Will they be coming after Jennings soon or can they not touch him? Doan is a complete idiot and I agree with the above poster that she and others firmly believed in that eternal Republican majority and they could do whatever they wanted. Christ, I'm a lowly secretary and even I know what the Hatch Act says one can and cannot do.

10:57 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is the best iteration of a Jackie Mason routine I have seen in a long time:

"I may have been there but I don't remember."

"Someone may have told me about it but my computer crashed and I was doing my nails"

Maybe I thought about this but my meds are too high and it is all fuzzy"

"The dog ate my PowerPoint!"

NEVER have I seen someone so totally nailed and left to desperately cling to the claim that she "just can't remember" when she was the one leading the discussion and has a string of witnesses from her own party, stating in deposition under oath that she was asking everyone for input on how they could all help promote GOP candidates using the power of the agency.

I think she might be guilty. I'd love to see her try and pull that routine in a courtroom with a jury watching. It would be 10 times worse than Libby trying to cover his tracks while a string of reporters contradict his story.

10:57 AM  
Blogger David said...

Oh my god, Steve Muhlberger, you did not just make a SEBTP reference. I'm gonna faint.

11:02 AM  
Anonymous rbb said...

Mr. Muhlberger did indeed make a SEBTP reference, although I thihk he should have used "Thankful" rather than "Grateful"...

Wonderful stuff here.

11:19 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

C'mon. Have some sympathy. Early onset dementia is serious! And there appears to be a real epidemic upon Republicans.

Maybe, if we could end the tax cuts for the richest, we could fund research into why BushCorp employees don't seem to be able to remember anything anymore.

I'm worried about the poor dears.

11:32 AM  
Blogger James W. Pharo said...

Ms. Doan knows EXACTLY what she said and did and is transparently lying, telling the one lie that is hard to definitely disprove: that she does not remember.

She is a hack from top to bottom. Her whole history is one long bout of hackery. She became a government contractor by sucking up to elected officials, then become such an official herself. The idea that she is trying to build a top-notch management team at GSA is a not-very-funny joke.

This woman is scared of orange jumpsuits and shackles not because those darn Dems are so unfair, but because she is so darn guilty.

11:50 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The reason I'm not buying the 'I do not recall' is that she's (IIRC) been in this position only since 2006 and the presentation obviously had taken place after the 2006 elections, i.e. in the last 4 months. At some point there has to be a limit to how quick one can pull a 'I do not recall' and get away with it.

11:55 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Steve said:
"Grateful for her fine fair discount, Doan cooperates."

Oooh! Out dancing with the moonlit knight are we?

(I saw The Musical Box back in February. Had a major flashback experience)

11:57 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Saw" the Musical Box?


I don't want to play croquette.

12:10 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm gonna take a wild guess and say that she was probably joking.

12:13 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

She took a blistering. I'd be paranoid too. Especially, after Waxman's last question.

You spoke on the telephone on two occasions with FAS regarding the Sun Microsystems contract. Is that not correct?

Even though she JUST testified to that effect, when he put it in that form she just through her arms out in a "you got me" pose and shrugged.

12:19 PM  
Anonymous Paul R said...

My new word is (Sperjury) Definition when republicans are put under oath and try to use there talking points. It always results in a perjury charge

12:24 PM  
Blogger Hogweed said...

Still alone in o-Hell-o. See the deadly nightshade grow...

12:26 PM  
Anonymous Dave_in_RI said...

Thanks much for the link. Just watched the est of the hearing. GSA Inspector General and Congressman Waxman both called Doan a liar. Shouldn't this lead to criminal charges? The whole story is amazing. A GSA meeting on how gov't contracts can be used to help Republican candidates. Outrageous.

12:30 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I was in the Federal Government (NOAA) for 15 years from 1990 to 2004 which spans Bush I, Clinton, and Bush II. In Seattle, Washington DC, and Alaska.

I can tell you that during those 15 years I got endless email and paper memo reminders about the Hatch Act and what is does or does not allow. Before every election season we'd get these departmental-wide emails reminding us once again about the Hatch Act.

I also recall working in DC during the 2000 Gore campaign when a lot of senior managers were jumping onto the Gore bandwagon. However there was acute awareness of the Hatch Act and those who wanted to help out the Gore campaign were actually taking leaves of absense from their federal jobs to work with Gore. NOTHING and I mean NOTHING political was happening inside federal offices.

The fact Doan has gotten crosswise with the Hatch Act has nothing to do with ignorance or sloppiness. It is political arrogance pure and simple. They just thought the rules didn't apply to them. After all, Hatch is a Republican and the original intent of the act was to keep Democratic-leaning Federal employees from working for Dems. They probably truely believed that it was never meant it to apply to God's party, the GOP.

12:39 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Please tell me someone took her glass to freak her out... err... freak her out even more.

12:41 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Does anyone else get a total Will Farrell vibe from Con. Braley?

12:46 PM  
Blogger Jeff a.k.a. TrojanGuy said...

Haha. That's hilarious.

12:52 PM  
Anonymous bleat my little ruffian bleat said...

Those, um, "people" do not believe in the validity of the U.S.Constitution and therefore are themselves less than citizens. They are in fact rebels. Confederates. Johnny Rebs.

12:56 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

She really needs to be waterboarded.

It's the only way to be sure.

1:12 PM  
Blogger Samuel said...

Seriously. I mean, the way people are grilling her, you'd think she'd committed some kind of crime!

1:21 PM  
Blogger SwaG! said...

Forget her fingerprints. You know they're going to get her DNA from the buttsweat left on her seat.

1:37 PM  
Blogger dusty said...

To put it mildly..she was befuddled. Can't wait for Sampson's testimony tomorrow. Cspan is getting more hits than the 24/7 news channels at my house lately.

1:54 PM  
Anonymous wuzupdawk said...

"...telling the one lie that is hard to definitely disprove: that she does not remember."

Sure worked for Libby, did'n'it?

Irrelevent. If you're going to lie, lie big. Saying you don't remember will not soften the blow or get you any sympathy. You might do yourself a huge favor by simply asserting your fifth amendment right from self-incrimination.

2:01 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

After all, Hatch is a Republican

The Hatch Act is actually named after Carl Hatch, who was a Democrat.

Doan must be worried about criminal liability at this point, though she's a small fish in the larger scheme of things. Whether she remembers or not won't be the issue; she's not being charged with perjury. With multiple witnesses attributing those statements to her, she can be charged (and convicted) even if she claims not to remember. Also, the PowerPoint slides are very damning.

2:17 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I just went to the GSA website, and filed a report with the fraud unit there asking that lurita doan be investigated for violation of the Hatch Act.

2:38 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dumb as a rock and slippery like a snake. She's a typical RepubliCON appointee whose training includes being able to say,"I know nothing" 5,000 times wihout laughing. As a former government employee, we were reminded about illegal activities under the Hatch Act. She knows about the Hatch Act but choices to go along with the criminal activity of the White House.

I'm telling you impeachment is the only way to go with these crooks. Under oath and then out of office!

3:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Considering that she pretty clearly violated the Hatch Act, I would be worried if I was Lurita Doan. At the very least, she's out of a job. I wonder how breaking the law and looking totally clueless in front of Congress will look on her Resume.

4:23 PM  
Blogger Steve Muhlberger said...

Glad to have an appreciative audience for the Genesis ref.

5:18 PM  
Anonymous liquidlen said...

Just listened to that album today - a good thing, or I would have had major "tip of my tongue" for god knows how long.

6:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

CONGRESSMAN: Ms. Doan, this is a Powerpoint presentation...

DOAN: I would like to plea insanity.

CONGRESSMAN: That would be far more believable than your "I don't recall" bullshit statements...


6:31 PM  
Blogger Lon Bordin said...

She STOLE a glass! Where's the cops when you need them?!

7:18 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Seeing we're on Nitpicker it's thankful not grateful.

(greatful for the nostalgia btw)

7:29 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I haven't read the Hatch Act lately, but I would be willing to bet that the penalties (if any) of violating the Hatch Act are significantly less severe than the penalties for perjury.

When will they ever learn.

9:21 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love Tierney and Lynch! BTW, did anyone catch Waxman calling Doan's weak parse-job "Clintonian"? LOL!

1:12 AM  
Anonymous Ken said...

I have the good fortune of knowing Mrs. Doan. I am not associated with GSA or any political party. Mrs. Doan is one of the most honorable people I know. This is appearing to be a Witch Hunt based on party lines. The lady is frightened and fighting for her life and reputation. I wonder how well other would hold up to such interigations?
I would much prefer to read the facts than listen to professional "Spin Masters" If she is guilty, remove her. If not, leave her alone

11:50 AM  
Blogger Nitpicker said...


I'm sure she's a nice woman, but the truth is she sat in on a political briefings on government property which seem to have suggested that she could use the power of her apolitical office at the GSA to influence elections. That's less than honorable and her evasiveness during the hearing made it all seem even worse. It's sucks that she's frightened, but she should have considered that prior to allowing her office to be used as a pawn of Karl Rove's master plan.

3:03 PM  
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10:11 PM  

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