Thursday, June 12, 2008

Right Wingers on Boumediene: A "Shorter" Roundup

Shorter Ed Morrisey:
I'm so confused I think this means they'll have to put Marines on trial for detaining people
Shorter Stop the ACLU:
The framers only intended people to have rights if the president says they can have them.
Shorter Debbie Schlussel:
Don't these judges realize we can't win the war against dusky terrorists if we're better than they are?
Shorter Floppy Asses:
I only read opinions by Scalia and Roberts because they use the angry words I understand. Also, because a tiny percentage of the terrorists so far released from Guantanamo have proven to be actually bad enough (or angry enough about being detained for numerous years) to do bad things, we should hold all the rest indefinitely.
Shorter Andy McCarthy:
As a former federal prosecutor, I find the mass killing of people who have yet to be proven guilty so funny I had to pass it on.
Shorter Leon Wolf of RedState:
Like I've always said, the Constitution should be ignored.
Shorter Carol Liebau of Townhall:
How can these judges care about the Constitution when I'm still pissing my pants about terrorism?
Shorter Lindsey Graham:
A kangaroo court is too good for these people. And the innocent ones? Fuck 'em.
Shorter Joe Lieberman:
Guantanamo detainees should get Geneva Convention protections, not Constitutional ones. Of course, I agreed with taking away their Geneva protections, so...um...not sure where that leave us.
Shorter George W. Bush:
A 5-4 decision means the court is deeply divided and that means their decision is somehow less meaningful...um...
[Shorter concept stolen from Busy Busy Busy.]

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